I know what you're saying and you see it in all races. You can hear the same feelings from any "group." People need to start taking responsibility for their lives and the position they are currently in. Blaming others for your position is not going to get you anywhere (even if your position IS bad due to someone else). Quit b**ching about it and DO something. You don't like your life -- CHANGE IT. Quit passing the buck.
I've had my share of "woe is me" moments and I had to get over myself and change. There aren't any other options. Don't wait for tomorrow to make the move.. tomorrow may be worse. rnrnanyway - nice post.
Jerald Sheets
· 4 years ago
Word, bro. Well put and well observed.
Multiply it by 30 or 40, and you have the beginningsofan idea of what it is like in the South.
Marc
· 4 years ago
Amen, Aaron, amen. When minorities cry racism, it's usually reverse racisim on their part. Too many people find it easy to accept a poor quality of life and never work hard, apply themselves, and realize that the only people holding them down are themselves and their surroundings.
Mike
· 4 years ago
Whoa... Where'd this come from? I do agree with you though... Everyone is to blame, but they are not responsible for anything... As long as the government continues to support them why do anything for themselves...
Maureen
· 4 years ago
I COMPLETELY AND TOTALLY AGREE WITH EVERY SINGLE THING YOU SAID! but i don't know about living in baltimore - i think it's just in general... there are plenty of times i could buck the system being a double minority but i prefer to work and succeed. i don't like handouts! ain't no such thing as a free lunch cuz you might have to pay with your pride!!!!!
Aaron Brazell
· 4 years ago
I definitely don't want this to become a bloodfest. The truth is that it is not a race issue but because that is what I am exposed to, I can draw certain conclusions based on what I see. The reality is it is more likely an economic issue. I just can't seem to nail down what the real problem is.
It's strange. When I went down to Virginia Beach a few weeks ago, I stopped at a McDonald's in Northern Virginia to grab a bite to eat. The woman at the drive-thru was as nice as could be and I admit having a little bit of culture shock over the thing. It was the same way when I went down to Larry's a few weeks ago. People were actually nice at the Burger King in Prince Frederick. So different than my area.
I go to one of these places in Baltimore county and I feel like I'm such an inconvenience to people. Do they not realize that me buying a chocolate milkshake is providing their paychecks? Is that really that foreign of a concept. They don't want to be bothered.
As I look at the situations and I drill down to the bottom of the matter, the only conclusions I can draw has to do with upbringing, which speaks to the culture they are in, which speaks to the choices made and the actions taken. I heard the word "character" once defined as the combination of every choice you have made in your life. We have a serious charachter problem and no, it's not everywhere. It's in these pockets of society that I've spoken of.
I can only draw conclusions from the evidence presented.
Maureen
· 4 years ago
i retract the double-minority statement cuz you are right - it's not a race thing - i've seen black, white, hispanic, asian, purple polka dotted people with that "poor me i'm such a victim that i can't get ahead" attitude. and i have to ask, why oh why go into the service industry if you couldn't care to whits about another person??
Aaron Brazell
· 4 years ago
Because it's a way to have cash. It goes back to what I said about self-preservation. When individuals do nothing but look to themselves and are in the game for only themselves, they don't see the big picture such as customer comes in and orders food. Customer pays money. Money goes into corporate assets. Corporate assets include overhead. Overhead includes salary. Salary means paychecks.
They see. Customer comes and orders food. Customer is an inconvenience because they'd rather talk to the girl they are working with. They want paycheck on Friday afternoon.
There's a disconnect there. It also plays to the way they are raised in that they have been told that they don't and will never amount to anything. Money is only for "The Man" and they keep it to themselves with the exception of a few Uncle Toms. So when these kids and young adults go to their menial job they don't see their job as meaning anything in the big picture.
Maureen
· 4 years ago
i'm agreeing with you farrrrr too much today aaron! this is a really bad sign!!
Maureen
· 4 years ago
ummmm aaraon - it was a rhetorical question! LOL what i meant was PLEASE don't go into the service industry if you couldn't give two whits about another person!
Mike
· 4 years ago
Here we go... Here's a way the complainers can get what is owed them and have a better life...rnrnCash joins symbolism as penance for slavery!
Yeah, I want my tax money to be given to Blacks in this country to pay for something I, nor anyone in my family had anything to do with... Here it is the BIG handout... You know they're drooling over this... Cash handouts to any Black individual in this country over something that happened close to 200 years ago and no one living today was responsible for...
The push for reparations is getting stronger and stronger... Another reason for not taking responsibility for improving your life...
Aaron Brazell
· 4 years ago
Mike.... that's a completely different issue altogether, mate.
Mike
· 4 years ago
Same mentality... The "Man" caused all their problems and now they feel they are owed payment for their lack of accomplishment in their lives... You know, blame someone else...
Sean M. Crawford Sr.
· 4 years ago
As a black man I can agree with all that you written. There was a time I did blame the WHITE man for my own shortcomings and situations. But I will be the first to say I have more white friends and few black associates.rnrnI too am sick and tired of my race wasting time blaming instead of doing. For the few white people who thought that I may have been blaming them for a shortcoming I can say you are wrong.rnrnI am proud to be black but I am so embarrased by my race. Even I get cursed and called an Uncle Tom because I gave up the street life to do something legitimate and better. And believe me when I say I FIGHTS ERDAY for the survival of my family.rnrnAaron I applaud you for that. And if you get any heat I got your back because you are my family.
Oriole Fan (Aaron, you know wh
· 4 years ago
Aaron, te posr was an insightful read. Being that this is my first comment via your blog, give me a slack here. I usually glance Technosailor every once in a blue moon, and this time I felt compelled to give my two, or in this case, it might be ten cents. Aaron, your mentality does not reek of racism, as many of my friends and even myself have thought about the issue you are having in Baltimore County. I, for example, don't care to drive into Randallstown to stop for gas when driving home from State College, Pa.
The issue is more than just lazy black people in Baltimore County, it's a socio-economic problem and the forces in place that should be helping people to improve their lives in matter which may be acceptable to us have failed.
Being an American History and English major, I have studied American culture time in and time out and I do agree in the most with what you have written. Being a African-American from the completely different side of the tracks, I can certainly understand and more than relate to your side of things.
Being the devil's advocate, I'd like to bring another part of the equation into place. Like you, I'd not want to live in Baltimore County, well, because it's Baltimore County. However, it is kind of difficult to tell people who don't know any better, lack parental guidance, never had a father or mentor, or have it seethed into their head that they are inferior to suddenly improve themselves. Keep in mind, a lot of these kids to go to school in places that you'd never want you kids to go and a lot of the families in that area don't have the typical nuclear family in place.
Keep in mind as well, a lot of the people in that area are GOOD-MEANING people, just that alot of them cannot afford to move, just because they don't make enough to do so. Add to that good kids who get caught up in the element, and bam, we have the ingredients for the conversation we have here.
Like I tell my youngest brother, if young people favor following 50 Cent rather than the prinicples and ideology of Martin Luther King in the encylopedia, we have a deep problem. This example is a very small issue among many in the black community.
Yes, all the obstacles and thoughts of inferiority are surmountable, but it is much, much harder to overcome and not as easy as saying, "yeah, get a job or go to school", when many of these people don't have the means to do so.
This problem is so complex, historical & so deep rooted, that a blog cannot answer it.
Aaron Brazell
· 4 years ago
Excellent! I always appreciate another voice which does fill out the holes in my own argument. Thanks, O's fan...
Stacie
· 4 years ago
This post very much impressed me - it mirrors many of the feelings that my friends and I have. I'd like to put a different spin on this. I have lived in Baltimore County all of my life and wanted to move to Columbia where living seemed to be a bit more upper class. What a joke - people making well below average want above average housing and get it. So, you have the family making over 100k who has the money to upkeep their home and the family making 30k who can barely support their children. But living in the same home. Please answer this - why is it so difficult to clean up your yard? Mow the grass? Plant flowers. There is a reason certain neighborhoods are not increasing in price - if you want a home, then please take care of it!
Anyway, I use to stereotype people by color and living conditions, but now I have a different term - ghetto mentality. It consists of white, black, asian, etc. people who just don't care, feel that others are holding them back, or want a free handout. It consist of black people who blame the white man for slavery (history note: all races have been slaves in some form or another) or white trash who can't take care of their lawn. It includes women who suck dry the welfare system or lazy people living off disability from SSA (did you know that SSA will continue to support people who can work but don't want to because they will make less than their disability checks?). Newsflash - you have no one to blame but yourselves. And bravo to those who take responsibilities for themselves for good/bad.
As for Baltimore vs. Arundel vs. Howard counties - I've seen it everywhere. WTF ever happened to good service. You get paid to smile and help me, just like I get paid to do my job. I am so sorry that you have to stop your personal call and filing your nails to help me, but deal with it. It's called job responsibilities.
Good post!
Aaron Brazell
· 4 years ago
Alright, Stacie! You filled in quite a few gaps there that I didn't hit on, but you're absolutely right about.
All Comments
I've had my share of "woe is me" moments and I had to get over myself and change. There aren't any other options. Don't wait for tomorrow to make the move.. tomorrow may be worse. rnrnanyway - nice post.
Multiply it by 30 or 40, and you have the beginningsofan idea of what it is like in the South.
It's strange. When I went down to Virginia Beach a few weeks ago, I stopped at a McDonald's in Northern Virginia to grab a bite to eat. The woman at the drive-thru was as nice as could be and I admit having a little bit of culture shock over the thing. It was the same way when I went down to Larry's a few weeks ago. People were actually nice at the Burger King in Prince Frederick. So different than my area.
I go to one of these places in Baltimore county and I feel like I'm such an inconvenience to people. Do they not realize that me buying a chocolate milkshake is providing their paychecks? Is that really that foreign of a concept. They don't want to be bothered.
As I look at the situations and I drill down to the bottom of the matter, the only conclusions I can draw has to do with upbringing, which speaks to the culture they are in, which speaks to the choices made and the actions taken. I heard the word "character" once defined as the combination of every choice you have made in your life. We have a serious charachter problem and no, it's not everywhere. It's in these pockets of society that I've spoken of.
I can only draw conclusions from the evidence presented.
They see. Customer comes and orders food. Customer is an inconvenience because they'd rather talk to the girl they are working with. They want paycheck on Friday afternoon.
There's a disconnect there. It also plays to the way they are raised in that they have been told that they don't and will never amount to anything. Money is only for "The Man" and they keep it to themselves with the exception of a few Uncle Toms. So when these kids and young adults go to their menial job they don't see their job as meaning anything in the big picture.
<a href="http://www.ajc.com/tuesday/content/epaper/editions/tuesday/news_245e4ea9f5aa522800cb.html
Yeah, I want my tax money to be given to Blacks in this country to pay for something I, nor anyone in my family had anything to do with... Here it is the BIG handout... You know they're drooling over this... Cash handouts to any Black individual in this country over something that happened close to 200 years ago and no one living today was responsible for...
The push for reparations is getting stronger and stronger... Another reason for not taking responsibility for improving your life...
The issue is more than just lazy black people in Baltimore County, it's a socio-economic problem and the forces in place that should be helping people to improve their lives in matter which may be acceptable to us have failed.
Being an American History and English major, I have studied American culture time in and time out and I do agree in the most with what you have written. Being a African-American from the completely different side of the tracks, I can certainly understand and more than relate to your side of things.
Being the devil's advocate, I'd like to bring another part of the equation into place. Like you, I'd not want to live in Baltimore County, well, because it's Baltimore County. However, it is kind of difficult to tell people who don't know any better, lack parental guidance, never had a father or mentor, or have it seethed into their head that they are inferior to suddenly improve themselves. Keep in mind, a lot of these kids to go to school in places that you'd never want you kids to go and a lot of the families in that area don't have the typical nuclear family in place.
Keep in mind as well, a lot of the people in that area are GOOD-MEANING people, just that alot of them cannot afford to move, just because they don't make enough to do so. Add to that good kids who get caught up in the element, and bam, we have the ingredients for the conversation we have here.
Like I tell my youngest brother, if young people favor following 50 Cent rather than the prinicples and ideology of Martin Luther King in the encylopedia, we have a deep problem. This example is a very small issue among many in the black community.
Yes, all the obstacles and thoughts of inferiority are surmountable, but it is much, much harder to overcome and not as easy as saying, "yeah, get a job or go to school", when many of these people don't have the means to do so.
This problem is so complex, historical & so deep rooted, that a blog cannot answer it.
Anyway, I use to stereotype people by color and living conditions, but now I have a different term - ghetto mentality. It consists of white, black, asian, etc. people who just don't care, feel that others are holding them back, or want a free handout. It consist of black people who blame the white man for slavery (history note: all races have been slaves in some form or another) or white trash who can't take care of their lawn. It includes women who suck dry the welfare system or lazy people living off disability from SSA (did you know that SSA will continue to support people who can work but don't want to because they will make less than their disability checks?). Newsflash - you have no one to blame but yourselves. And bravo to those who take responsibilities for themselves for good/bad.
As for Baltimore vs. Arundel vs. Howard counties - I've seen it everywhere. WTF ever happened to good service. You get paid to smile and help me, just like I get paid to do my job. I am so sorry that you have to stop your personal call and filing your nails to help me, but deal with it. It's called job responsibilities.
Good post!